Little Johnny puts his hand up and asks if he can 'go for a pi$$'. The shocked teacher says he must ask if can go urinate. When he returns she asks him to make a sentence with the word urinate in.
He replies "urinate Miss, but if your tits were bigger you'd be a nine...."
Later in the week, teacher plays the alphabet game.... Give me a word beginning with A. All put their hands up including Little Johhny. Considering the sweary options, she picks Abigail, who says apple and describes an apple. The game continues, she considers B for swear options and again doesn't pick Johhny. Same with C.
When D comes around she can't thing of anything rude beginning with D so she gives Johnny a go.
'Dwarf, Miss.'
She is relieved and pleased.
'Now tell us what a dwarf is Johnny'
Holding his hand about four feet from the floor he replies...
'It's a little c**t about this big.....'