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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200634

Yes, I think it might be best, there are others who might not share our pleasure on this long & winding navigable channel / flight path / road (or race track) but hey thanks for the company along the way.

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200635

Well, in a land of snakes, poisonous spiders and weak beer, it don't take much to be a national treasure! Joking apart, we have come a long way from the topic and I, for one, have enjoyed the journey.


You left out the man eating sharks, huge crocodiles, killer jellyfish, deadly octopuses and the most terrifying of all……. Drop bears!

Nasty vicious creatures with murderous intent, they may look cute and cuddly sitting high up in the trees. That’s what they do to lure in unsuspecting people who get close underneath to a better view, but when you’re directly under them they drop on you in a blur of razor sharp fangs and flick knife claws, shredding the flesh from your bones!
Australian Museum
Never heard of drop bears? I’m not surprised as the government tourist authorities cover this up and blame outback serial killers for missing tourists and backpackers, as they’re much less scary than drop bears!

And as for weak beer, you do realise the the awful swill we sell to Jonny foreigners ( Foster’s ) isn’t actually drunk by anyone here, we keep the good stuff here, in fact the manufacturing process involves a small bottling or canning plant connected to every pub urinal.
A brilliant concept, first we drink proper beer, the package the results for export to all you lot! They get to sell the same beer twice.
Next time you’re sipping on a frothy refreshing Fosters….. think of me and the enjoyment I had in my part of making it!
"Keep calm, relax, focus on the problem & PULL THE BLOODY TRIGGER"

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Last edit: Post by Cobber.

Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200636

Our drop bears were confined to Scotland some years ago but were gravely predated by the indigenous haggis which drove them all into Loch Ness, where they were eaten, I am reliably informed, by the monster.
Refreshing Fosters is a phrase held in high regard here, like Government Initiative or Military Intelligence.

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200637

I, for one, have thoroughly enjoyed this 'off piste' conversation. Whilst getting lost amongst the technicalities, I have nevertheless been fascinated as to where it would meander next,:P
David
:shrug:

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200641

I’ve been off piste for a good many years although minimax & Cobber seem to be more recently informed.
My favourite piste was French, red & expensive, colonial wines were still in their ascendant phase, not reaching their apogee until long after I was mainlining on dandelion & burdock.
Prompted by too many expensive interests something had to go & given the choice between inexpensive Britpart spares for the Landies or the genuine article, especially in an emergency stop situation (emergency stop & series Land Rover are words that don’t normally sit comfortably in one sentence, thus stretching tautology to its elastic limit, if not beyond)
I went for the off piste option.
Sorry I said I’d shut up!

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200642

Is it true that the Tasmanian drop bear can be neutralised by putting its head in a bucket of blue steam?
Isn’t there a dragonfly out there that’s as big as a blackbird & can’t fly much above three foot (1mt) & belches fire around blokes in shorts?

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200643

Nonsense. Dragonflies don't wear shorts. Regarding expensive hobbies, aviators have a saying: If the Good Lord had meant man to fly, He would have given him more money.

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200646

I bow to your superior knowledge in this area as I’ve never been further south than the Isle of Wight. Mind you there’s some odd life forms on the island & surrounding mainland towns.

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200647

My F came over from the Island as it happens but you are right about the coastal towns. Portsmouth was greatly improved by the recent zombie apocalypse and Poole is very strange indeed. Further West, Portland people are frightened of rabbits so your surmise is correct. There is civilisation further South of the Island, beginning 68 NM from St Catherine's point. It only ends at Watford going North. Meanwhile, It is bloomin cold, A microswitch has gone in the recently replaced door latch and I have both a streaming cold and a 400 mile journey to do at the weekend, half of it on Sunday evening when the SUV owners will all be going back to their London addresses for their working week. Slippery roads and the hard of thinking in new SUVs are portents for a tedious trip...

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Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200649

The steam needs to be more of a teal hue rather than blue.
And as for the greater hoping dragonfly it actually generates much static electricity from the frantic beating of its wings, when it’s near Blake’s in shorts the bleaching of flames is the static actually igniting any bowel growl gas leaking from the shorts
"Keep calm, relax, focus on the problem & PULL THE BLOODY TRIGGER"

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Last edit: Post by Cobber.

Speedo optimism 1 year 4 months ago #200653

Haha! You guys crease me up! :-)

For the record, my speedo agrees with the GPS to within a couple of percent at 70mph. Or, at least, it did. I fitted new rear tyres recently. I bet that made a difference.

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